Its 3.30am.early morning.I am still awake.Don't know why.No reasons.I never feel like sleeping at the usual hours humans do.But i love watching people sleep. So people doubt if i see dreams or i am getting void of them. I confirm , i m a dreamer.I dream a lot about future.Open eyes.Closed eyes. I dream of my village.There are ponds with fishes and trees with beautiful parrots . Birds who hum all the popular tunes of the day.Brighter days & darker nights.Fading stars,lanterns , radios & long black umbrellas .The autumn breeze.The falling leaves .The morning fog.Her whispers.Thousand expressions in those twinkling eyes.Love. Happiness ,serene and gracious. My world is a pleasant place and it wears one of its pleasantest aspects each time.I smile in my sleep.Must be very cute when i do so.
In reality ,I face people everyday.The likes of genuine unrest inducers.People who create more history that they can consume .I discuss the weaknesses of the world with the totally uninterested ones.I stay quite when she expects me to talk.I build virtual networks and plant isolation in between them.I walk the deserted roads at midnight,whistle to some self-composed tune and talk to myself.I become high and low and everything in between. I quarrel with 6 months old kayush over phone.Try to decrypt the sounds he makes and make my own interpretations.I give myself a lot of benefits of doubt.I make fun of danda & share my dreams with him.Its life. But its interesting.
I even think of an alternate future. A villa at Florence.Alone in the hills,far away from the crowd . The Villa "Sub-Rosa" would sound rather quaint and picturesque.And i suppose i must have a hobby.like..strawberry farming!! or something like wolf-hunting or may be marine research or say kite-flying.I will own a vespa to ride through the winding hilly roads.From my balcony will watch the sun setting behind the cold mountains while the gramophone plays Stevie wonders. Then there will be the black skies , the lightening all around & the cold winds.The first drop of rain falling on my face. Eyes closed , memory erased.Just peace of heart.
They say happiness is relative.For me its becoming absolute.No reference point.I have developed a tolerant feeling of indifference within myself.Someday I might want to trade my happiness.Someday I will come across a really safe thing, a bet that simply can't go astray.Then i shall put it up for all i am worth or rather for a good deal more than i m worth if anybody sold me up to the last button.
And it would be really awkward if it din't happen to come off.
